Ariel ^^v

I'm really scared

2011-10-22T06:53:00.000-07:00

O levels are starting in 2 days, yet I'm woefully under-prepared. There's so much to study, so much things to remember.. but there's not enough time. I feel so overwhelmed I could cry. I really don't know whats wrong with me. This is important, I really can't screw this up. Yet, despite knowing this, I still persist in my lazy ways and just.. did nothing. I can't believe I did this to myself. I told myself time and time again, try to study at least a month before O level, that way, you won't be in a state of panic like I am right now. I really could cry right now...

I'm really a fool.

Things I should not do now :|

2011-10-17T04:04:00.000-07:00

Online shopping.
Obsess over Neil Patrick Harris
Think about my trip overseas
Tumblr
Making lists of things I should not do

Just a month till O level ends, yet I don't even have the will-power to stay focus until then.

Dolphins

2011-08-08T03:43:00.000-07:00

I don't understand. I honestly don't. RWS has been earning substantial revenue, why do they have to do shit like this? Animal cruelty is not a joke. Aren't we supposed to be a first world country? Honestly, I really can't believe it. What the hell were all the people in RWS thinking? Is there no one sane enough to go, ' Wtf are we doing? ' or even to say 'I don't think this is a good idea.' especially after two dolphins had died.

Tomorrow is national day, but I can't help but feel so ashamed of my country. Is this what we are, some fucking joke of a first world country, disregarding animals' rights ? I really hope someone in RWS do something about this, else it would be so disappointing.

I don't understand

2011-06-12T09:02:00.000-07:00

It peeves me off, when people say shit like, 'Omg this show is so cool, they pair a fat ugly girl with a hot guy!!' , in a way insinuating that the show is somehow trying to show that its alright for a hot guy to date a fat ugly girl? But.. it just seems so misguided to me, no matter how well-intentioned. What's so special about that? It just irritates me, so what if they are not exactly typical pretty girls? Why the hell does it matter? It's not what we should take extra notice of, urgh I feel so useless being unable to phrase my thoughts in a coherent manner. But I really don't understand why people feel that fatgirl-hotguy pairing is so (ahead of times?), different from normal show when it is not. It is like fat girls don't deserve it, when that is so wrong. People should stop harping over shit like this, I can understand their sentiment but it is so fucking misguided and it makes me sad that society has come to this level whereby we applaud this type of paring in shows when we should not even be noticing it. I guess we are all vapid, shallow and superficial asses.

Disappointed

2011-06-09T09:05:00.000-07:00

I'm fucking useless and a disappointment. Where's my will-power ? I'm a fucking failure. Starting from now, I need to change. I will fucking change.

I don't even..

2011-06-04T10:11:00.000-07:00

Sup. Vivo with Chloris was fun and yeah, I'm not much for describing the day and shitz. Tumblr is getting meh now, intial hype of (re)finding it is dying. Maybe I'll go retarded over it again sometime later.

I love youtube. It's like, the most awesome thing since ducks. It's as of now 5th of June 2011 , 1:18am. Yeah......... I really have nothing much to say, just staring into my computer screen writing this. Why? I don't know.

I wonder why I always do things to myself that seems to serve no purpose but the make me feel uncomfortable. I'm smart.

I wish I lived in the USA whenever I'm online (window) shopping. Shipping charge is a bitch.

A land called hypocrisy

2011-05-29T05:53:00.000-07:00

No fucking clue how irritated I am. I have chinese O levels tomorrow and I wrote stuff at Sihui's house and I left it there. How fucking smart of me. I love people who think the best I can do is a failure, awesome.

On a happy note, midyears :
Emaths, Amaths, SS/Geog, Chemistry, Physics- A2
English- B4
Chinese- D7

I need to study harder though, its not good enough.

I want to show you that I'm fucking smart k.

Hardcore

2011-05-22T02:12:00.000-07:00

If you want to do something, don't half-ass it . Do it hardcore . Make it matter .

Oh gosh.

2011-04-09T11:43:00.001-07:00

My blog is filled with myriads of my rambles. Some just full of contradictions. Its really interesting(for myself) to read, and actually feel rather embarrassed of myself. Its really weird how differently I think after only a year.

Home

2011-04-08T01:32:00.000-07:00

Despite complaining incessantly about my country, I realise every time I see a list of countries, I will immediately scroll to find Singapore. I'll feel happy when my country is better than others. If I ever immigrate in the future, I'm not sure that I would actually feel home there. However, this could just be fleeting thought, maybe I'll have a different opinion in the future. How cool would it be if I get to read this post in maybe 1o years down the road.

I'm cool like that

2011-04-02T06:52:00.000-07:00

I wonder what is it about studying that makes me just so sleepy. I don't get sleepy using the computer, I should learn to enjoy studying. I really want O level to come like now, but I'm so unprepared, oh gosh. It's my fault for being so lazy but it's ok, I'm even too lazy to even bother.

I realise my days are just like repetition, waking up on the weekdays and going to school. Half-awake in school, hoping for lessons to end, then going home to eat, use the computer and sleep. How awesome am I?

Ok, I'll make a promise to myself that I'll do some studying tomorrow. My spacebar is spoiled and I'm using an on-screen keyboard and it's so annoying. I should stop typing.

Tired

2011-03-14T05:21:00.000-07:00

Its the start of March Holidays now. Chinese O level is in May, yet I don't feel even the slightest tinge of urgency. My mid-years were disappointing, but I deserved it. I have no idea why my default feeling(?) is tired. Constantly. Ok, I must study tomorrow, I will study tomorrow. I have to do well.

Everybody loves you when you're six feet under

2011-02-12T06:35:00.001-08:00

Is this a bit morbid to talk about ? Sometimes I don't understand the logic of that, if you're an asshole in your lifetime, why are you suddenly a saint when you're dead ? I know from a logical point of view, it is really nonsense, but I guess when you realise the fact that he is gone forever, you start to be more forgiving of someone's faults, and just focus on the good parts . I guess we should apply this to life, be more forgiving, after all, what's the point of focusing on someone's merit when they're dead ? Wouldn't it be better to do so when they're alive ? But then again, when someone's dead, they are pushing all their flaws to you, so you tend to forget them ? I don't know, I never had the experience of losing someone close to me before, and I am really afraid of that day . I guess I can never truly empathise with people who did yet, though I am trying . I think it's rather intriguing how different people cope with their loss, like how much people's behaviour differs . How someone can just shrug off their failures, and someone can brood over it for days . What determines our reaction ? It's just so interesting, how opinions differ, how different we can be, yet so similar . They also say, that there are no two people that are exactly the same, but there are so many people in the world, and also could I be exactly the same as someone in the past ? So many question, sometimes , I feel small, in this epic universe . Sometimes I feel so scared . But then again what is life ? I think I should just, enjoy . Try to do what I want to do, I want to explore the world . I want to meet people, I want to smile .

Study least you end up with no future .

2011-01-15T06:01:00.000-08:00

Isn't that what is being told to us every single day, drilled into our brains ? But I really don't fancy the subjects I learn, yet there is hardly any future in those I love . I want to travel the world, just spend my life having fun , yet there's this nagging feeling of getting a typical good job and blah . Can I even do that ? I don't know what I want to do with my life, am I just going to waste it away, always hoping for that one day, when it will finally begin . Life is happening now, it isn't starting tomorrow, when I'm 18, or when I'm 21 or whatever . I want to be happy, positive, and just stop having mean-spirited thoughts . But sometimes, I just can't help it . Ok what am I saying, I should just be what my heart tells me to be . Change doesn't happen overnight, it happens gradually, until you don't even know you've changed . What's the point of telling myself ' CHANGE NOW' and then when I do something the old way, I get irritated and give up . No, patience is the key, I'm not living yet, but I plan to start now .

2011's resolutions

2010-12-30T04:50:00.000-08:00

1: Study hard, stop procrastinating !
2: Be determined ! - Then can jian fei ~.~
3: Just be a nicer person- I'm older, I should be more mature now .

I really hope I can fulfil those resolutions ! I realised that every year I make some, and I always forget about it and that just defeats all the purpose in it, no ?

New year resolutions ;

- Study harder , I can't just anyhow anyhow like in Sec 1 and 2 .
- Be nicer , ya I very cb fucked up .
- Make friendship last , I reallyreally hope this will happen .

Gosh, this was my last year resolution, and no I don't think I studied really hard this year, nor was I a nicer person . I guess I have to try harder ! Which brings me to my second resolution, ok I will try my best to be the person I want to be . But gosh, another year has gone past, just so so so so fast . Life just moves on, when you're waiting for it to begin, and I've been waiting, a lot . I need to stop thinking, 'Oh, after my O level(Or insert whatever age/important events), then I will be able to do what I want to .' I should start living now .

What has happened this year, I got into a good class, I guess ? Oh and something really great happened, I become really really good friends with Sihui :) . I lost some friends, got some friends, but I guess everything will turn out okay . I did some things I regret, but I guess I'm the only one who will remember it, so I will get over it, and start the new year happy :) . My end-of-year results weren't great, but I guess it was just... well I'm satisfied, though I will do better next year . I guess I'll just hope next year will be better .

School is starting soon, I looking forward to it, yet dreading it . Gosh, my feelings for school really fluctuates so quickly . I've cut my kinda long fringe a few weeks ago and I actually kinda like it, though I'm afraid it will give me pimples ! My webcam quality is really horrible and I have no idea why the colour is like so, but at least it makes me look fair !

Sucking in my cheek fats !!

I really like to use my hair to cover my hugeeeeeee face .

Constance looks really cute here ^^ .

Wanted to watch Narnia yesterday, but it wasn't showing at Cathay and Golden Village, tried Eng Wah and TPY, but it closed down, awww I really wanted to watch Narnia . Anyway Chloris had to go work, so Sihui came my house and we started camwhoring 'cause its really fun ! :P

Stitch from Chloris ^^

Cute duck from Chloris, Hello Kitty puppet from Sihui ^^ I've got really cuteass things :P

Our eyes looks kinda .... psychotic

Retard No.1 !

I like this picture :)

Oh and I don't have my Chloris picture sooooooo ,

^^

Water games ^^

2010-12-26T22:07:00.000-08:00

I'm in love with water games ^^ Went to KL to shop which is soooo much like Singapore except with better food - especially the chicken ! Then went to Port Dickson which is soooooooo fun !! Tried Kayaking, Jet Skiing, Banana Boat and one other ride which is damn fun . It make me so sore the next day but soooo worth it , really scary, hanging on for like life , and I saw a freaking flying fish !!! So cool, but so scared it would jump on me -_- .

The resort is kinda pretty too, haha I love water sports I dont even mind the sun !!

I love Kenny rogers too, omg malaysia chicken is sooo tender, even the breast meat ! I wonder what we are doing wrong here .

I love Krispy Kreme too !!!!!! Yumyumyum, better than almost all donuts !

Very interesting meh, just a tall building , which makes me wonder why people wanna go Singapore :X

Wah retro sial .

Woah the food here is super delicious 100% i could go back just for the food I wonder why is malaysia's food so nice to eat !!!

Ok malaysia trip was really fun !! I really love traveling, ok I need to study hard to earn money to travel :( .

Ok then went to mummy friends house for christmas, went to ehub and watched two shows, gulliver's travels and the ghost are crazy . I really really liked the first, though I was expecting horses and more places ? Yeah but it was still really enjoyable and jack black is really funny and suited in that role ^^ . The other show was rather retarded and just a waste of money honestly . It was kinda funny in a slapstick humor way .

Oh and my daddy finally subscribed to discovery channel and national geographic ! Yay, I can like watch them all day, especially when my internet is being an asshole, which it always is :(

Rapunzel : A tangled tale

2010-12-16T06:18:00.000-08:00

The show was sooooo freaking awesome . Oh gosh i love her long blond hair and green eyes . I am now jealous of a cartoon character :/ . But its sooooooo really nice and i love mandy moore's voice ! I'm so jealous of people with nice voice . Is there such thing as voice transplant ? :( .

Han's is really yummy though , argh i am a fucking pig grrr . I can't wait to watch Narnia ! It seems very cool ! My internet keeps going - The webpage cannot be found . Oh gosh , i think i'm turning into an internet addict . I really have nothing to write i think I have a really mundane life though i'm not really complaining as i have to be grateful, think of those in really shitty countries then you'll start counting your blessings . Kinda fucked up to think that way ........ hmmm

Sihui is an asshole !!

2010-12-15T05:26:00.000-08:00

Christmas is sucking all my money !! :( . Time is flying past sooo fast its going to be a new year soon !! I finally dl-ed the webcam thingy so i can be self absorbed and camwhore when my internet is being a bitch ^^

Killing my cute duckie T_T

Hais i have to bear with Sihui being an asshole :( !

One more year ....

2010-11-18T17:41:00.001-08:00

School is really like shit . I know hate is a strong word, but currently I freaking hate school . I don't hate the idea of school itself, I just hate my school . I hate the teachers, I hate the principal . I hate the fucking retarded rules in this school now . Whats with all the lameass cctv everywhere ? I swear they're gonna install some in the toilets next -.- . Like seriously, they are so strict about the promoting stuff . Like what the fuck ? If you fail English by maybe a few points , they don't even help ? Like seriously English is like damn hard to teach ? Aiyah whatever, I'm out of this school in one year . I honestly hope I'll do well enough for O lvl so i dont have to stay an extra year in this shit school . Schools are where students spend most of their time in , shouldn't they try to make it at least bearable ? -.- .

Kk anyway , at least its the holidays now ? :D Okk hmm i need to try to jianfei why am i so lazy pui :( . I need a duct tapeeeeeeeeeee .

Senseless violence

2010-11-10T03:50:00.000-08:00

I don't understand it . There has been like 3 slashing cases recently, one fatal . I don't understand how people can just kill a person for stupid reasons such as staring ? They wasted their chance at life- at such a small issue . What goes on in their mind ? They hurt people, for no apparent reason . Why ? Why do you have to do such acts- unprovoked . It just doesn't make sense to me, violence never solves anything . Ok maybe it does , but only at the surface . You have to solve the root of the problem . Wars never solve anything, and only creates an extra bitter feeling , in the losing party . Singapore is a safe country, I hope it stays that way . Whats with all the violence nowadays ? Violence is never the way . People should just chill :(

Meaningless

2010-11-03T02:57:00.000-07:00

That how most of the songs this days are . Ok wait, they got a meaning : LOVE SEX DRUG CLUB .
They sound nice but where is the meaning, where is the true passion for music , isn't music about expressing yourself ? Then again, maybe their life is just full of love, sex , drugs and clubs . :/

Unappreciative

2010-10-31T07:48:00.000-07:00

Our lives are actually quite good . Our standard of living is quite high . Why do we still whine, why are we so unappreciative of what we have . Why are we so greedy, always wanting more and more and more ? I mean if we watch the news , we know that we are so lucky to live in Singapore . Why are we not appreciative . Why do we only love Singapore- when we're in a foreign country . Why do we always appreciate things when they're not there . I guess thats how we are . We can't cherish things when we still have it . I guess then , its a blessing not to be born rich ? 'Cause if you were, you wouldn't be appreciative of your wealth . Too much of anything is not good I guess .

Annoys me

2010-10-28T22:47:00.000-07:00

62 ppl's fingers had a random spasm while trying to press the like button and clicked the wrong one...thumbs up if u agree

I hate this type of comments . Why can't people just dislike a song ? Like honestly, why does everyone has to have the same taste as you ? Why can't people just accept that they dislike the song ? I think I'm damn retarded to get irritated but what the fuck is wrong with these people's mind ? I see these comments all over youtube and it never cease to annoy me -.- .

And it also annoys me when people keep are soooo obsessed with stars . Like stfu already, and by that i mean mostly korean stars . 'Cause soo many singaporeans are so crazy over them . Like ok I like them too, but whats with the freakish obsession, you can dream, but they'll never know you or love you or whatever . I mean its ok to just dream about it but really really believing it ? Delusional -.- .

I hate people who put singapore down . Like fuck off then -.- Why the fuck are you living here then ? Like singaporeans who HATE singapore . Ok i hope you were born in somalia then :) . And foreigners who don't like it here ? Then why are you here -.- , i think its cause we have good education system and medical healthcare :) Singapore is awesome . Bye

And the thing that irritates me the most these days is the MOTHERFUCKING HAZE !

Awws

2010-10-24T07:14:00.000-07:00

I have been using money as though its paper this days .
I can't find my diary too !

At least I have fun going out ? ://

The world is weird

2010-10-19T04:51:00.000-07:00

Without hate, we wouldn't know what is love . Without sadness, we wouldn't know what is happiness . Without death, we wouldn't know what is life . Without darkness, we wouldn't know what is light . Without the cold, we wouldn't know what is warmth . If you have not lost, you would not know how to cherish . The world works this weird weird way . I guess it keeps everyone on their toes ? Hmm like this awesome book 'The Ghost Of War' I just read by Ryan Smithson -

" I'm grateful for the worst in humanity, because it's the closest I'll ever get to understanding the best in humanity . "

Hmm you need something to compare it with . If you're always happy, how would you truly know what happy is ? Wouldn't 'happy' to you be normal ? I'm not sure how to phrase it well but yeah :/ . Idk why am I so interested in such things :/

OKAY, anyway, got back English, Chinese, Emaths, Chemistry and Physics papers today :)

English - 28/50 ( Should I be satisfied ? But I feel so disappointed with myself . I need to improve, i need to get A1 for my O lvl ! )
Chinese - 10/70 ( I'm a failure chinese T.T )
Physics - 81.5/100
Chemistry - 88/100 ( Lucky number HAHAHAH )
Emaths - 62/80 , 81/100

So overall I'm quite happyyyyyy .

Heehee

But tomorrow is the papers that I think I suck at , awws . Must try harder !

Janice

2010-10-17T23:50:00.000-07:00

This is my smart lurb who is going to get all A's for O lvl ^_^ .

Self-denial

2010-10-16T05:59:00.000-07:00

The world is dying, the world is screwed . Fills my heart with disgust, with the lack of compassion, the absence of human touch . Serial killers, rapists and whatnot, how can any human being be so cold-blooded ? But then again I guess its the degree of seriousness, words can break a person too, inside . I need to get rid of the bitch in me and start doing what I think should be done . The world is screwed, global warming, just because of human selfish needs . They do not spare a thought for the Earth, its our home, our only home . People starving dying, yet we waste food . I know what I want to do in life . I always avoid the topic of global warming and serious issues, why ? I always think that if I don't acknowledge it, it will go away . Retarded i know, but the cold hard truth is, I'm scared . I fucking afraid . Thats why, but I need to acknowledge it, to know about it, before I can try to help . I need to grow up . I need to change my mindset, that someone will take care of it, someone important . WHY, Why can't I be the one to make the difference ? I'm living my life NOW . This is life, why am I constantly thinking to myself, I'll grow up and make the difference . MY LIFE IS HAPPENING NOW, whats with my wait ? Life in uncertain, I could be dead tomorrow for all I know . Why do I care about the world so much ? Because I know, despite the disgust I have for the acts human can do, some acts in the world, touches me . Lifts my spirit, makes me cry even, because there is hope in humanity . Despite all the gross misdeeds that humans did, there's also unbreakable spirit in humans . The will to live, the goodness in their hearts , sacrifices so noble . The human race is not beyond hope . We can make a difference . We can change the world . Don't ever let anyone tell you that you can't . Because you can, someone can do it, why can't the someone be you ?

Don't ever look back ,

2010-10-13T07:27:00.000-07:00

'Cause the past cant never be retrieved . Whats gone is gone . Move on, get over it . Time doesn't stop for you , learn to deal with it :) . We'll all end up the same :) .

I should be a vegetarian- stop eating chicken !!!! :(

YAY , exams are over !! Heehee like finally :)) , but I'm kinda scared i retain blehhh . This stupid fear nagging at my mind boo . I hope hope hope I won't ! I will study hard for next year :) 6 points ! Went out with Constance and Sihui to celebrate the end of exam yayyy :)))))) . ( Omg excessive use of smileyyys- fuck a duck :D)

Went to Bishan to eat pizza hut ^^, the tomato soup tasted like ....... freaking diluted + boiled carrot juice ? Omg , gross much ! Companies should stop trying to cut cost at the expense of quality ! Wanted to watch Charlie St. Cloud but it was sold out -ish ? LOL, too many people wanna see hot zac efron ! Lollll, went to kbox instead . Oooh damn funnnnnnn , heheh i love my chacha and coconut hehehehe . LOL I'm typing like retard, i should fail my English :/ .

I have no idea what to write . I mean my day was really fun, but when I write about it, it seems sooooo mundane ? Well, I guess that means I suck at writing ? Hmm , note to self: Improve on writing skills ! HAHAHAH I'm full of nonsense at time .

Gonna bake with Shuhui tmr ? YAYYYYYYYYYY :D

I'm an idiot

2010-10-09T08:03:00.000-07:00

I always do things i regret . Why can't I ever learn to stop doing stupid things . I think I lack of common sense at times .

Dare to dream .

2010-09-30T04:18:00.000-07:00

If you tried and failed , at least you know you did your best . But if you don't even have the courage to try in case you failed ? Then you have already failed .
Have some courage . I will get 6As for O lvl . I must get that .

We should .....

2010-09-25T22:28:00.001-07:00

stop getting caught up with ourselves and look at the big picture .

But its so hard, not be self centered .

If only ,

2010-09-16T05:10:00.000-07:00

If only humans can rid themselves of sloth, greed and jealousy, the world will be a better place . Like communism, i think its the best form of governance, in its supposed ideal states of course . Some , take communism and present it in the ugliest form ever, isn't it , the point of communism, is that everyone is equal ? So why do dictators surface ? Hmm, I find the human mind really interesting . How some people, have such great minds, yet some use it for good and some for evil . What triggers that ? Isn't it, sort of fascinating ? Is our nature inborn , or is it cultivated by our surroundings ? Are we born evil , or good ? How we can change, with just a mere event . How we can be so different . How can someone , with so much love for his mistress, feel so much hate for another race . How someone , can feel such a hatred for another, to murder them in cold blood . Maybe its because I never felt such deep hatred for another, so I do not know how . Some, like Ivan the terrible and Bloody Mary, their life was plagued with tragedies , was that what turned them evil ? Or was everything pre-destined ? However, Bloody Mary never felt she was in the wrong, she felt she was the savior of her religion . And like top ranking Nazis , most of them do not feel they are in the wrong for killing Jews . Are they to blame ? Were they already brainwashed by Hitler, or do they honestly feel that it is alright to murder innocent people as it is their job . However, Hitler always refer Jews as it, as if they are not quite human , is this such to preserve his sanity, to not go crazy with guilt ? I don't know, I doubt I'll ever know . Is it normal to have such curiosity in such ? Hmm, I think genocides are scary . Like the holocaust, others kill Jews for they do not want to be killed, is this really the reality of the world we live in ? In Rwandan genocide, neighbours, can turn into killers . Could you imagine that ? Like in the holocaust , it happened a mere 71 years ago . Yes it may seem long, but there are some, who experience it still living . It may seem eons ago, but it is a very short time, in history . The Rwandan genocide, a mere 16 years ago, though I must admit the holocaust seems more unexpected as Europe is considered an advanced continent .

I have this weird fascination with two things mainly, history (mainly wars and such - am I sadistic ?) and humans . Wars, they bring out the worst and the best in humans . How people can act so differently, in the same circumstances . It shows how evil some people can be, how they seem to have no heart, no compassion, and not even the basic respect you give, to another human being . And yet some, can risk their lives, and sometimes, even give their life, to help another . Like some , who dedicate their life, to help a cause, to fight for freedom, and some, doing what they can, just to save another life . Such people, really give me a hope, a hope that the world , is a nice place . Yet some, can kill others, for their own benefits . How some, can just, try to break the spirits of other, and just destroy them, and their soul . Like in America during the times where there were slave states and free states . Some even capturing black men, who were free from birth, to sell them as escaped slaves just to earn money . Why do humans do such things ? Humans are such complex beings . However, what I think, is just my personal opinion, who know what I would have done, if I were living in those times . I can't guarantee I'll think the same way as I am now . Humans, I find it ... cool, that we are basically made up of the same core components, yet we are so different . How I can like the taste of a particular thing, and others don't . How we can be so different in so many aspects yet the same in so many . I hate the unknown , yet I'm also scared of finding out the unknown . I'm so contradicting at time . I need to figure myself out, how else would I be able to make sense of others actions when sometimes I can't even make sense of my own ?

Many things to think about .

Gay face

2010-09-01T05:24:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I think I lose my senses . I have no idea why sometimes I type like a mental retard . Hmm, but then again I'm not one dimensional I guess ... Hahaha I feel like stupid , unable to sort out my own thoughts . They say humans usually use up to 3% of their brain power ? I guess I use like 1% ? HAHAHA . Ok hmmmm the mind is complex . This world is complex, but how can it not be, since we don't really know how the world started . Big bang is just a theory , no ? Ok i need to get my facts right before I sprout nonsense . Hmm I just feel so lazy bleh .

The only thing wrong with doing nothing is that you never know when
you're finished.

Hmm yup I never seem to stop idling . Theres so much in the world to do , to experience , so why am I wasting my life ? Aish , so many conflicting thoughts, I wish my mind would just choose a side .

Happy Birthday Constance :)))

2010-08-30T20:44:00.001-07:00

hehe so gay

Yups anw other pictures are like in fb so no need post twice ? Hehehehehe, ok idk why am i writing it here ? Hmmmmmmmm . I really hate blogging now like no point / boring urgh, its gay like writing and show everybody though i know no one reads la only myself lololol . kk i dont really have a way with words so like fml ? hehehehe anw i hope she has a very happy birthday yay :)))))) .

Ok hmm life is really short , too short to take shit too short for be to be unhappy guilty ? HAHAHa idk i talking cock cause i know despite knowing this , i cant help myself hm ........ idk la lolollllll i like ducks :)

Oqjewoqjd :@ :@ :@ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

2010-08-28T12:27:00.001-07:00

ARGH . Guilt guilt guilt , anger anger anger , pride pride pride

I NEED LIKE TEN YEARS OF SPACE TO SORT MY THOUGHTS .

Determination

2010-08-27T06:03:00.000-07:00

I want to be thin . I need to be determined . Please let me find something in myself, some perserverance , maybe not just for this, but for life too .

....

2010-08-10T08:02:00.000-07:00

If i pray hard enough, will my dreams come true ? If i believe it will happen, will it ? If i try to make it succeed, will it ?

Defination of Friendship .

2010-08-05T07:45:00.000-07:00

Mine's to stick by the person, and just to accompany them ? Obviously your personality has to match too, you cant just have awkward silence and count that as a friendship ? Of course if your personalities don't really click perfectly , but friendship needs work too , you can't just have everything go your way, you have to try .

I may not be the best friend ever, but I think I do try . I may not always do the right thing, i may not be exactly the nicest person ever, but I really do try . I think I'm not that hard to be friends with, all I care is whether you TRY , whether you put in the EFFORT . Is that too much to expect for ? I really don't care if what it ends up with , as long as you had an intention .

Whats the point to go out if we want to go the same place ? I mean sometimes you just go just to accompany me , and sometimes i go just to accompany you . Is that wrong to expect ? The closer you are to me, the more I expect for you , because the closer you are, the more i care about you .

But sadly, I'm also a motherfucker at times . I'm not some very nice person I admit . So how, you not at fault mah . KKK thn your problem . You can just lame tgt or smth . I'm really irritated now . And I cant stand if you say OK thn ltr like go nononono , without a reason . Thn sorry but you're no friend of mine . And sorry I will not be some hypocrite and still act nice to you . But th closer you are to me, i also care more 'bout the friendship . But if you;re like half-ass close to me , tht i expect ABIT more than normal friends, but also not close enough for me to care so much . Then fuck you . I don't give a shit abt your feelings sorry i also dk why am i so cheebye one . fml .

....

2010-07-31T08:17:00.000-07:00

I guess this is a way of being fair . This part horrid and the other part good enough that i feel thankful for . So why am i still being so greedy . I should be happy , why do i feel like it's not enough . I guess i have to accept those shitty parts . Hopefully it will pass ?

But still lifes like shit .

Liars liars

2010-07-26T07:48:00.001-07:00

now i'm irritated pui .

Life's a bitch

2010-07-22T06:49:00.000-07:00

I need to take some initiative sometimes . My life is just stuck at this point . It's boring , i don't want my life to be like this . I want to have fun , but how :( . Hmm , but i know i've ought to study hard first ^^v . Ok, why am i writing all this nonsense ? -_-

Hehehehhe anyway today is elearning ! But I didn't do any :/ , hmm but i went out with Sihui :D . I wanted to buy a bag but i cant find it grrrr . But i've got a super pretty pencil box :D . Hehehhe i love buying things don't you ? :P I love soup spoon , omg i love food . Shit i need to stop eating so much !! Kkk trytrytry ! I shall stop bring $$ to school, i'll be rich by no time HAHAHA . K lame hehehe k I know nobody rly reads this but i have fun reading my old post so hehehe . i love reblogging in tumblr too , addictive :P .

Helpless

2010-07-09T05:45:00.001-07:00

Its like .. you wna help, but you really just cant do anything much .

:(

Question mark .

2010-07-07T06:39:00.001-07:00

You start out life with a clean slate. Then you begin to make your mark. You face decisions, make choices. You keep moving forward. But sooner or later, there comes a time when you look back at where you have been and wonder who you really are.

Hmm

2010-06-22T07:14:00.000-07:00

June hols = watching movies all day long . Yups exciting life i have

I like to camwhore with webcam LOL . K i need to starve myself rlyrlyrly need to .

In short ,

2010-05-27T08:59:00.000-07:00

Things change . Get over it .

Hais .

2010-05-21T06:47:00.001-07:00

Sometimes, I feel like the world's greatest idiot .

I think sometimes, I care too much . No this isn't right . I'm going to try be some uncaring bitch . 'Cause i rather be fucked up to people than to get fucked up by people . I guess I'm selfish that way hmmmmm .

Aiyah idk ????? I dk anything ? Idwtk anything ?????? Emotions and feelings are irritating max ? Aiyah I will try to bu guan le .

ONLY 3 k :(

Celestineeeeeee [:

(L)
I look like baichi in all picts below T_T

:( . Nvm look at Celestine can le i like ^^

My fringe has been reallllyyy annoying ........

Anyway on a happier note , it's gonna be holidays soon ^^ . Though I think I'll be stoning mostly at home..... And school is a bitch , abit ..... but mostly my form teacher which is super annoying la ! -.- . Bth seriously . But I'm satisfied with my results ^^ . I'm gna jiayou and spend less of my time being stupid and caught up with this useless shit and spend more of my time studying . ^^

Yes i can do it k :D

Chloris

2010-05-15T08:20:00.000-07:00

Hmmmmmmm , went to celebrate Chloris' fifteen on 14th may . Hmm my present was the best ok , thnks . :]] Ok went to my house then hers then went to meet them . Cake , movie . Hmm thn went home with Chloris .

Sleepover , went out she gmasked her camera which is v v v pretty i also want !! Then walked more and went for dinner with her family . Food was awesome ^^v .

Yummy maxxxxxxx :]

Ugly zombie here :(

HEEHEE PRETTY CAMERA RIGHT HAHA JEALOUS x10 .

Ugly girl here :[

^^

and omg i look so ugly like fucking fat face zombie ugly ugly ugly max gna cover my face t take picts now . :((((((((((((((((((

Bio sucks balls

2010-05-10T03:26:00.000-07:00

Exams are finally going to be over !!!!!!!! :D (insert a hundred smileys here) . Heehee i'm like soo happy 'cause I seriously think I'm gna fail bio, so no point w. last minute spamming right ? LOL I guess i'll just read through, but no staying up to study for it ^^v .

Amaths exam today , wah damn cui . Sian everyone saying it easyyy like WTF , its mad hard . T__T and i like maths ..... for other subs ... also suck cock la . English is i anyhow kp until out of topic i think ...... :( . For chinese , ok la cmi as usual :x . Geog & SS wtf no time :( . Physics made me sad :(((( . Chem , ok la improve cfm CFM . SIAN maybe i do v badly now thn do v well for eoy get good progess $$ HAHAHAHAH . I feel so cheapskate :$

Heehee i no friends so no one t take with !! :( FML max . Ok went to like study w. Celestine . Saw Sihui and Sinrou and went to eat lunch w. thm and t th libraryyyyy ^^v . Studied like ABIT ? LOL . Mostly talking w. Sihui and Sinrou whilst Celestine studied . Hmmmm kk smart pple no need study la LOL ^^v .

Talked alot heehee so fun i likeeeeeeeeeeeeee :)))))) . I like talking to them ^^ . Tmr is th last exam, but theres no marking day ? WTF ????? :( I don't like ! ( + max angry face )

Ok going t meet Eunice tmr ? I guess okkkkkkk bb time t watch shinee videos :DDDD (w. max hearts)

Nothing better to do .

2010-05-02T20:45:00.000-07:00

^^ cute much ?

Exams exams exams, and I'm still watching youtube whole day long lol . I used to wonder how people can watch youtube the whole day, ok now I understand. I have nothing to do , nothing to say cause I did nothing everyday except watch videos .

Shinee is awesome ^^v . K shall study one day before th exam for every subject, k at least i'm studying ^^v .

Aiyah this is nonsense lol wtf .

Tired .

2010-04-24T06:47:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling sooo lethargic , like I haven't slept for a day when actually I've got more than enough sleep ? Hmm , my eyelids are like drooping, my brain is not fully awake im like drifting through the days , without really concentrating . Argh, my brain can't absorb anything , its like goes in , goes out . Pui this sucks how to study ? Mid-years are coming , what kind of timing is this -.- .

My mind isn't alert, it's too sleepy . Despite sleeping enough and everything, when I close my eyes, i just feel like sleeping . Had maths mock test today , I'm forever failing amaths thanks . And usually during physics tuition, it's quite ok, today i just felt like lying down and sleeping . T_T . Whywhywhy , i hate this time , i want be a guy alrdy la -.- .

Ok went to study with my sister , hmmm , i guess i'm not putting any effort :/ , but aiyah now my mind really can't focus . SERIOUSLY , my body is fucking dead one -.- . I'm like yawning constantly now -.- . Going to study with Chloris tomorrow , seriously must wake my mind up , concentrate .

Hmm ok , time seems to fly- my time is now all taken up by sleeping -_- .

Pearlyn ^^v .

K noted that i look kinda uglyyyyyyy aiyah but fuck can't be fucked to cancel my face or smth , tired like motherfucking shag like that zzzzzzzzzzzzz .

FASTER END PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE -.-

-_- ?

2010-04-20T01:50:00.000-07:00

One girl and several guys = disgusting, no ?

' I don’t really think people can change . At the end of the day, you are who you are, and it’s probably who you’ve always been . '

Yup, no matter how you try to change, at th end of th day, if you could, you still would . But course I'm nothing; you don't have t please me , but surely I'm entitled to my own opinions . You're not wrong, just that I find it kinda gross .

Kk anyway, mid years and coming and I'm fucking screwed . Time to study- i'll try :[ .

Dear Ariel ,

2010-04-18T05:24:00.000-07:00

Why are you such a fucking pathetic loser ?

What the fuck .

2010-04-17T09:52:00.000-07:00

Ok went out with Celestine love yesterday did abit of hw ok talktalk . Heehe i love her kkkkk ^^v . Like ttm :)) .

Ok went to the library with my sister today hmm borrowed lots of books, time to read 8D .

And seriously, if i'm that terrible, should I be touched i'm worth th bother or should i be irritated -.- . Honestly, what the fuck should I do . Seriously what the fuck . I need someone t rant t then I realised I've got no one . ZZ I FUCKING HATE EVERYTHING PLEASE TREAT ME AS A MENTALLY RETARD PERSON , I'LL BE 10x HAPPIER .

Fat :(

2010-04-14T07:11:00.000-07:00

Zz sian 2.4 today almost died -.- . Think I failed, tomorrow 5 items, think I'm going to fail this sucksuck cock . Hais sian im so unfit :( , time to jian fei so fat T_T .

Mostly chloris cause i look so ugly !!! fuck man T_T fat and ugly sian really need to jian fei !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :(

Regret .

2010-04-13T03:20:00.000-07:00

Things I've done , and things I should have done .

Zz stop over-analysing things . Most times , things are as simple as it seems, when did I get so paranoid ? :( . I don't like , must be not paranoid , must change ! :(

Baichi

2010-04-12T02:32:00.000-07:00

Thats how I feel right now :( . Like a fucking baichi . Hais , whats with this stupid thoughts . Zz , seriously overthinking, overfeeling over everything :((((( . Aiyah i am so annoying -.- . Zz don't think so much , take things as it comes . Do what I want to do , without thinking how it seems to others, do I really need to explain myself ? Actually I also don't know . Baichi :( .

Anyway exams are coming , like end of this month and start of next month , brain in daydream mode . Faster start working la :(((( . I'm not prepared to take exams , I know for sure I'll fail most of them (esp. chem & bio) zz . Really really not prepared, really really need to study .

Aiyah whats with all this pessimestic thoughts :( . Aiyah fuck la hate whatever I'm thinking zzz stupid brain only think of boliao shit and not important one .

School was sucky fuckfuckfuck i hate all th DMs so annoying like ttm ESP . WILSON LEE . Zz crazy annoying one zzzzz i hate school fuck it please . 2 more years till i'm finally out of deyi , I don't really mind some of th teachers and everything but some of them make it like shit -.-

:(

Retard girl .

Supposed t be blossom , but i think my hair too long .

Bubbles, haha shit i damn failllllll .

Baichi with no eyebrows :((

I love m&m :) Chinese teacher confiscated it though :((((((( .

Ok i realised hoping, wishing and expecting only leaves you with disappointment . No , no longer am I going to hope for anything anymore, no way am I going to have any expectations of anyone .

Sibeh camwhore

2010-04-11T08:16:00.000-07:00

Ya I chi bao fan mei shi zuo lolol . I am so boliao and zilian :$ .

K nvm whats the use of a camera if you dont use it when you're bored what !!!! Went to study with Reena today :)))) . Ok I did study abit on Geography :))))) .

HMMMMMMMMMM . I realised I'm so boliao and stubborn :( . And honestly I think I should really make up my mind . Argh so indesicive , so many thoughts so many zzzz , i need to organise my mind , thoughts are contradicting . Thought stands aren't really firm , it's all in a grey area . I want my mind to be in black and white . Hais , sometimes I see things from many perspectives , sometimes, only one . ZZZZZZZZZ . I rather see it from one . Because from many , I feel guilty to be angry ( even though its normal t be angry ) . Zz wtf baichi .

Hais why I think so much , why I'm so ~.~ , indecisive , paranoid OVERTHINKING . Why can't I just let my mind act and not my heart . Why am I so concerned about nonsense . ZZZZZZZZ , I need to learn to bite my tongue @ times, need to learn to stop my stupid nonsense in my head .
But still despite my nonsense i always think , i don't think some is nonsense lo ......... OK NVM I MAKE NO SENSE .

Dreading school tomorrow thoughhhhh , exams , napfa coming . It's gonna be a longgggg longggg monthhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh .

Can't stand it .

2010-04-09T05:26:00.000-07:00

Zz , im such overthinking overparanoid overxzxzxzxzxz / :((((((( .

Hais sian . School sucks . Lessons so wtf ? -_- . Today didn't have lessons thoughhhhh , but i got do maths 'cause th teacher nice enough t help me w. it (Y) . Ok time to be attentive !!

Sometimes , our mind thinks too much, too deep , but when it isn't that far . You just have to ask . But why do I have to always be the one ? :(

On The Brightside

2010-04-08T06:24:00.000-07:00

Things change . People move on .

Everyone will ^^

I hate deyi .

2010-04-06T07:23:00.000-07:00

Elearning today , made me so happy ^^v . Went to find Chloris @ 3+ . Studied like abit ? -.- then went to compass point eat and walk . Went back camwhore then went home la (Y) . I like this more than school can thnks .

Napfa comign walao motherfucker i want to dieeeeeeeee :((((((( . Exams coming too zzzz siansian . School sucks , new principal so strict zzzzzzzzzzzz walao spoil mood . Hatehate school wth, so strict for fuck ? :(((((((( . SERIOUSLY i think i'll study better if th rules isn't so wtf strict like SERIOUSLY .

Dreading to go school lo walao ! Suck man , I must must MUST get good marks for O lvl , thn can be haolian and qianbian abit HAHA :x . Now too stupid cannot, must be smarterrr, k this is my motivation ^^v . FUCK TH WORLD , I SHALL GET GOOD RESULTS .

I MUST GET GOOD RESULTS TO PISS PEOPLE OFF (Y) . Awesome motivation yups ^^v

NSN so hot , i like i like :$

Apple day ^_^

2010-04-02T09:25:00.000-07:00

Went to vivo t celebrate Vuttichai's bday (Picts w. WL ^.^) . Met Noel at Amk hub to buy Vuttichai's cute present = Monkey and banana . Went to SK to make th cake for him . Sexy cake k , so cute w. many apples .

Then went vivo and I think I smashed cake on him 3 times (Y) . I'm awesomeee (H) . Kk thn walk arnd and saw pretty things that I want to buy ! :(((((( . Went to eat at the Soup Spoon with Chloris , awesomeeeeee i like like like :)))))) .

Watched Ju-on next , walao fuck man I hate horror movies , forever & ever thnksthnks :( . Noel v wtf keep scaring me and scaring me and scaring me throughout . And I think I killed Vuttichai's monkey LOL . WL walked out halfway and Eugene totally didn't watch i think . But the show also DAMN SUCKY NO LINK ONE . Kk then slack awhile , then went home . (Y)

Useless pictures .

( I LOOK FUCKING EXTRA UGLY TODAY )

:( .

Sian ji pua .

2010-03-31T06:42:00.000-07:00

Hi i want to dieeeeeeeeeee . I've got so much undone hw (which is my fault) and I need to submit my file by tomorrow omg fmlfmlfml, i can't minus marks for CA else I'll fail maths !!!!! NO CANNOT WALAN BUT I DK HOW TO DO FUCK FUCK FUCK :( .

I got back my results for E and A maths test today . Emaths - 13/20 . Amaths - 10/20 . NO I CANT AFFORD TO MINUS MARKS FOR E :(((( . Amaths = failure in alpha & beta . Fuck sial so confusing / hard zz .

Today damn fuck man, first period physics, mr ang damn cute LOL . K i shall be v guai during his lesson cause he v cute :X . Anyway freddygoh ask me go down t go detention for 'truancy' -.- . Thn he totally lamely try to check for piercing by asking me t press my lips -.- . Lame x10 .

Then recess tht normila go catch my skirt and socks WTF ! Nabey why she come back sials T__T . Waste my $2 go buy socks which I threw away -.- . Then had English oral thn tht stupid miss kong sat thr thn i irritated liaos SIAN SPOIL MOOD ONE . I think I'm going to fail oral because of her FUCK SIALS .

I think I shall try do copy maths hw & go school early (Y) . Heehee but I realised why I so much undone hw = DISTRACTED LOSER HERE . My stupid photospams -.-

Too free le :$

Act cute .

2010-03-29T03:30:00.000-07:00

I'm sick and tired of your reasons

I got no one to believe in

you tell me that you want me,

then push me around

i need you like a heartbeat

but you know you got a mean streak

makes me run for cover when you're around

Why am I like so cb sian like 90% of th time :( = Webcam fun (Y)

Fat face :((

I realise my life is kinda boring like ttm . School is boring, i hate lessons esp. English, that one suck cock until cannot suck cock . Bio - sleeping time . Yups just damn sian ji pua for the whole day , talking, daydreaming sms-ing . Sleepysleepy , maths studies stone ? Time passes kinda fast/slow i also dk . Wtf is this . I think my mind is totally shut down now .

Emaths test, didn't understand a single shit during lessons -> screwed up test . My mind is like in daydream mode now , honestly . I can't think . Amaths test tomorrow . I'm so far back in all my homework that I'm dying . But I'm just so lazy ... dreading school studies zz .

I really need to manage my time get my lazy ass off th bed and to my books . Soonsoon .. but I don't understand a single shit ley ...... But I know I'm totally lost for bio, confusing with shitload amount of memorising to do . Argh . Oral on Wednesday , thursday is a longg day too . Maths studies tmr also ! But ya I don't feel th stress, brain totally cock up mode now . Need some motivation, like seriouslyyyyyy . I really need to go to the library soon . Catch up on my work, but my mind just really can't be bothered .

:( !!!!!!!

Cb sian .

2010-03-26T19:21:00.000-07:00

Isit me or what cause I laugh like fuck when I saw this heehee .

Sibeh sian like wtf , my life is so boring . I hope I don't become boring also omgwtf . Eh fuck no please . Soon me will be a very motherfucking boring person . Nabey :(

All my teachers hate me like but fuck them :( .

My life so boring should dig a hole to hide .

KK BB FML .

Locked and Loaded ,

2010-03-26T08:16:00.000-07:00

People change, people leave ,

Whether we like it or not .

Nothing, we can do about it .

The feeling of helplessness sucks .

But we all just have to suck it up , I guess I'll have to change .

Take a chance .

2010-03-24T06:58:00.000-07:00

I don't know why we all hang on to something we know we're better off letting go. It's like we're scared to lose what we don't even really have.

Nothing on you .

2010-03-20T00:06:00.001-07:00

People are greedy . Once you have it, you'll want more . Wouldn't it be better if you never had it in th first place ?

Give me hope .

2010-03-18T04:47:00.000-07:00

' I was reading about a little kid whose mom told him the key to life was happiness. When he was in school the teacher asked them to write down what they wanted to be when they grew up. He said happy. They said he didn't understand the assignment. He said they didn't understand life. My generation GMH '

' My freshmen year of highschool a sophmore girl with mental problems was elected to homecoming court as a cruel joke of some popular girls in her grade.

When our senior class president found out about this, he ditched his date, who was one of the leaders of the prank. He then asked the mentally disabled girl if he could be her escort to the dance.

Class presidents who are class acts GMH. '

' I was walking down the street and moving slowly in front of me was a couple.

The woman was elderly and being pushed in a wheelchair by a nurse. Her elderly husband who could barely walk himself held a cane in one hand and her arm in his other. Their love for one another was stronger then their frailty.

Hand in hand, they GMH. '

'Today, at an assembly, i saw a guy in my grade getting picked on by some guys on the football team because he was gay. the brutal insults went on for about five minutes until the quarterback, the king of our school, stood up and announced he was gay. nobody ever made fun of the kid again. after, i asked him if he really was gay. He isn't. GMH. '

Drop a heart, break a name ,

2010-03-15T21:30:00.000-07:00

Today = Wake up -> Read book -> Computer -> Read book -> Sleep .
& I think tomorrow will probably be the same :/ .

Maths remedial yesterday was ... damn sian ji pua la ? I hate congruency and similarities, i hate emaths .

My celestine lovelove so pretty right :)) .

Constance ^^v .

Homework is crazily alot, I want to hide at home with books forever .

Don't stop believing .

2010-03-14T05:34:00.000-07:00

You can't be anyone but yourself .

Here without you .

2010-03-09T02:11:00.000-08:00

I hate maths I love maths . So annoying . Hate it when I don't understand, love it when I do . Ok anw I failed like my Bio chem and chinese :O . Bio is fucking hard lo nabey, I think I regret taking it alrdy 'cause I know I'm gna fail all th fucking way till sec 4 . Awesome ah Ariel . Read finish Change of heart today, awesome book . I love Jodi Picoult .

I got back my phone too ^^v . Sunday pictures with Chloris , heehee love my darlign baby .

Shortie .

( Why so many picts of her ? 'Cause me is busy doing maths hw (Y) )

Pretty kebab ^ .

Went for detention today and did my maths hw . I think I should go everyday lol x__x .

Retard on th left .

Heehee jealous tht my two bffs are like fucking pretty right LOL . If only I'm a guy, that would be like awesome ttm . All my homework are undone but ya la , motherfucker I can't be bothered . March hols are coming and hope I won't be rotting like some tard at home . Heehee I love Cs .

Bb I fuck you all . Ariel rocks your balls thnks !!!!! :D

I'll stand by you .

2010-03-08T02:19:00.000-08:00

So cute :x .
-

School is crazily dullll . I'm not in the mood to study, esp. cause march hols are coming !!! :D Hmmmm, walked around , read a book daydream for the first 5 periods . Recess with Celestine, then had geog next . Forced Siongling to talk t me and I realised my marks suck cock . Ok then I think I read book all th way alrdy .

Bookworm for life :DD . Then went for Chem remedial which all I did was play w. Celestine's phone and not learn anything ? Then lunch with C & C and C went my house . Took some pictures, I look motherfucking ugly and C tht stupid girl keep moving so most of her picts = blur -.- . Smartest girl ever right, it's ok I still love you HAHA .

I LOVE CELESTINE NG . LOL

Bimbo !

(Y)
-
Went out w. Chloris on Sunday too :) . Picture in my phone which I lost but apparently th person is very kind so I'll get it back tomorrow . Heehee I love kind and nice people , must try to be kinder and nicer :o . Ok la I don't think I'm that mean ok ...... I'm like only really mean to people I don't like ? So ya IDC IF I'M SELF-DELUDING MYSELF NOW but i don't think I'm that mean lo ! I think I'm only fucked up t pple I don't like or don't respect so ya . Aiyah if you think I'm mean, it's probably cause I don't like you lol :x .
-
Ok now I'm thinking how lucky I am . Am I awesome or what ?! :D

Happy kid LOL

Chaoyang kid ^w^

I'm awesome :D

Cousin .

I (L) C .

Camwhore :D

Effing bored girl at home :$ . Okok need to bathe + do hw soon . Heehee bb .

Things will end up how it's meant t be .

Cry, you know it's not alright

2010-03-05T03:16:00.000-08:00

I fucking hate camp . I'm not some campy person so ya . I think I'm not that princessy but motherfucker la, if you're fucked up to me , obviously i'll give you some chaobin and piss you off right . -.- . Motherfucker . Ya totally didn't enjoy it, back totally ached like crazy 'cause of sleeping on th floor -.- . Ya i think I totally spoiled my class mood .

The only part I liked was the second night, slept with Chloris my love and we loser-ishly tried to meet Noel and SR to play cards or something . But my English teacher v annoying -.- . Sian , thn Chloris slept damn early and I tried to disturb her till she woke up . Ok and my favorite part of camp is damn physcotic . Is when a millipede crawled on this girl Vanessa's foot . Kk like damn mean , but wtf I don't like her ^^v . Ya I don't give a shit if she knows abt it cause I'm like damn obvious .

(My pictures' order are pretty much fucked up and it's my own face mostly anw)

Fucking blackie i like ^^

My darling .

V pretty hor, I likesxzxz :D

Bored @ home aft camp .

I love air-con . :$

From Chloris baby .

I like ducks ^^v

Hi i'm from bangaladeshi .

I realised I fucking got like ' counseling ' or somethign and they keep asking me what do I want to be when I grow up .

Hi I want to be a future bulldozer operator .

KK done with my tard-ness . Btw, webcam is awesome . I need more people to webcam with manxzzx . I'm so fucking bored like fucking ttm . Anw, I don't think I'm that bad lo . It's just that I don't like to hide what I think ? K i dno la , but wtf , if I'm that bad I won't have friends ? Anw, my results aren't that shitty ..... except for Chinese . I think I'm not that bad lo, definately not good la , but not THAT bad right . So fuck them all ok . I fucking passed my English test so ya -.- .

Maybe one day I will be finally not lazy and study fucking hard just so I can say , ' FUCK YOU ALL ^^v . ' with a fucking qianbian face . LOL one day ... maybe .. probably not . But still , fun to think about it LOL . Ok anywayyyy hmmm I need to do maths homework later and complete my fucking overdue Bio hw :x . Ok I'm reallyreallyreallyreally bored right now .

Ok I really need to go out soon . Boredboredbored, dying of boredem . Heehee bb I love facebook . :x

Boliao .

2010-03-01T03:52:00.000-08:00

Ya I've got nothing better to do LOL . But this picture is damn funny lo . :x . My sleeping schedule is totally fucked up now . I slept at like 5am on sunday, then woke up at 9am, then slept and 5pm , then woke up at 9pm, then slept again at 2am . Nabey, then I still woke up at 3am . Idk wtf is wrong with me . Then somemore had to wake up at 6am for school today !

Nothing better to do =

Ok anyway, I failed my bio overall !!! Nabey . This sucks . But I passed my English comprehension , heh . I think my English teacher is fucking annoyed with me because I always sleep during her class . HAHAHA BUT WHATEVER LA , I PASSED HER STUPID DAMN HARD ENGLISH TEST OK -.- . Ok but sian I think I'll fail Chem , and maybe Emaths . Stupid girl here , T__T . Apparently I haven't been studying a single shit at all . Keep procrasinating , and I'm so fucking lazy . Computer addict here :( .

There's social studies test tomorrow and ya la, I'm not studying, not really planning to either . LOL . Fucking lazy leys . Maybe I'll read through ..... maybe . And I've got maths hw to complete I like maths so I need to do it .... soon . LOL . Ok maybe i'll go school to do it or something . Lazy fuck here omg . Okokok i still haven't completed my enzymes tys which was due like 3 weeks ago ? Ok aiyah nevermind, shall TRY to do it after camp .

Camp is coming so soon omg . I hate camp (insert angry face here) !!!! Like mud and shit like that , gross much ? I hope I'll be sharing a dorm with either celestine , constance or chloris !! Maybe I shall bring a book there ...... hmm, I think I shall . I love reading books 8D . I went to the library yesterday and gonna read finish this 3rd book already . Heehee , bookworm here :D .

Aiyah I realised I'm really boring and shit like that, but yups, me is a very boring and dull person with not much of a life . LOL . Haha okok I realised Celestine was damn sad she failed and I really can't be bothered . NEED TO CARE MORE 'BOUT STUDIES, LESS ABOUT NONSENSE .

I think I look very tired and chaolao in these picts but whatever la . Pict was on Sat @ xinwang w. Liqing . Xinwang so yummy heehee i likexzxzxz . OK BB NO ONE IS FOLLOWING ME ON TWITTER WHICH SUCKS FUCK THM ALL :(

Light a way .

2010-02-26T23:41:00.001-08:00

A (L) C

Heehee hihi . Had physics tuition today . Ok, i think I understand, but I'm like sooo forgetful !! :( . Ok.. I still haven't done my hw , super lazy like ttm :o . Went to meet Celestine at Bishan for lunch .

^^v , talked and I made her late for her church :( . Ok anyway school is (Y) and a bitch . Its (Y) 'cause I passed my both my e & a maths tests :D . Heehee happy girl here ^^v . But it's a fucking bitch because of other subjects . Especially my English teacher !! Omg I hate her like ttm , seriously have this urge to give her one slap -.- . Honestly, she's the most annoying person ever, I think she's more annoying thn my co-form , which is alot already . Like what the fuck is her problem ?!?!?! I know she's got something against me and everything but she's still annoying ttm .

She isn't even interesting lo . She's like the ultimate boring-est person on Earth and she can totally make me sleep lo . I used to like English but now it's like damn boring la . My English is going to deprove and fail because of her . And she's teaching us next year also . Wtf . I totally feel like banging a wall and dying right now .

And apparently there's this new trainee teacher for English and she seems ultimately annoying too . Omg usually trainee teachers are nice, but she is totally wtf . I'm going to sleep during English lessons to annoy thm , sorry I'm very lame .

Ok anyway , I need to do alotalot of hw soon . Kk need to find people t webcam with :D

Give it all .

2010-02-25T01:07:00.000-08:00

Fuck this shit .

2010-02-23T05:33:00.000-08:00

You mean well,
but you make this hard for me .

Hihi , I hate school . I never was a studious person, never will be either . I get too distracted by other things, I hate studying, I don't want to learn new things . I don't think learning is fun or whatever . I hate memorizing, honestly, I'm the opposite of everything a best class student should be .

I think I damn stupid, everyone understands more than me, I'm like too fucking lazy to do my homework and its piling up like crazily fast and I'm dying like some retarded shit here . I realised I'm not good at anything . Fuck this shit honestly, I'm like doing half-fucked job for my hw and screwing up my common tests and fucking screwing with myself by not listening and shit like that .

Honestly, I don't understand how people can find joy in studying . Some people do, I don't . Whats with the fucking crazy shit load amount of hw , ok maybe we can do it if we like understand , but apparently I don't understand a single shit about it so it makes me veryvery ultra reluctant to do it . I don't like doing maths too, 'cause it makes me feel stupid . I don't like this feeling, I don't want to be at the fucking bottom every single fucking time . Last for everything thing, sucks ttm .

Ultimate irritated now and I've still got overdued homework and I'm so sick and tired and annoying of all this nonsense bullshit which is all my fault . Haha see how smart I am , I nothing to do come boliao nonsense on top of the nonsense I've already got . This suck, fuck this all .

I can't tell if my friends have changed, or if the way I see them has changed.

A mess it grows .

2010-02-22T02:47:00.001-08:00

Ok , went to study with Janice yesterday, I think I'm too entertaining to study with . LOL :x I did my Chemistry and Bio homework thought, and she learnt Geog, so it's not for nothing at least ^^v . Ok studied till like 415 and I went to meet Chloris at Tamp :) .

Talk eat talk . Yups, I think thats all we did . I like talking to people who we never seem to have like awkward silence . ^^v . Love my stupid kebab (L) .

Ok, school is .. boring . Had E maths test today, omg I think I'm gonna get super low , which sucks . English is the ultimate boring-est shit everrrrrrrr ! Honestly, I'm so going to fail my English . :/ I'm feeling damn stupid now , sucks .

I realise I think too much . I also don't know why . Sometimes I do things I don't mean to do, and sometimes I don't do things I want to do . Honestly this is stupid . I care too much what other people think . I'm scared . Ya wtf . And I don't like to admit it . I feel like some ultimate retard now . I'm totally annoying myself with my own thoughts -.- .

Sometimes the hardest things to say are the things that really matter .

Loser for life .

2010-02-18T04:28:00.000-08:00

Thats totally me :( . School totally like keep calling my parents omg wtf ):< . Angry loser here !! Sian x1000, I hate school !!! Boring boring boring, like ultimate . Why I so loser , I don't understand a single shit . Fuck school thanks :( .

Apparently my chinese teacher thinks I come from some troubled family -.- . My family is perfect to me already k thanks, fuck you all, my parents love me LOL . :x . Kk screw you all la, I don't want to study means I'm being a stupid loser screwing my life . Not your problem please go away I don't like all of you, you can't teach anyway, or else I will listen .

Anyway, I totally pissed my English teacher like to the max today , like awesome please :D . LOL sorry I'm a little bit too fucked up nowadays . Ok had bio practical today, did it with Celestine and she did most of it . LOL I don't want to touch an onion -.- . And teachers think cheeks cells are 'beautiful' when I just think it looks gross leys -.- .

Stayed back to do maths homework and Constance was teaching me . I feel so stupid LOL . But it's ok, i'll slowly learn :( . I hope . Then went to find my darling Chloris and ate and talked to her . My life is awesome without teachers , I do my hw and classwork ok ! For lessons I like . And ya, I don't respect teachers who are not worth my respect . ^^v .

Ok and I like to act-cute leys LOL how ? :( .

Hihi ,

I'm really bored .

And, I like to camwhore .

'Cause ..

It entertains me .

For awhile .

I entertain myself actually .

By acting cute .

And not really suceeding .

But it's ok la ,

I happy can liao :D

But I'll get bored easily ...

Really bored :(

So I do stupid faces ^^v

Like a loser .

Still camwhoring .

I like webcam .

Cause I am a loser .

And it is fun .

And I am bored .

Kk alot leys LOL .

Been playing Buffet Wars with Junqing like last two days , damn fun la LOL . Like gunbound like that, omg I like leys . Omg I've got lots of hw over the weekend , i'll try to complete all of them . Try la LOL . Camp is in 2 weeks, march holidays in 3/4 weeks . ^_^ . Happy kuku loser here :D

Confused .

2010-02-18T03:47:00.000-08:00

:( . My mind is like thinking alot of things, which contradicts each other . All my thoughts are so contradicting, how I act is contradicting too . Fucking retard :( . I don't what to do, i don't know what I can do now .

5600) Nobody knows when will friendship bonds breaks apart.

And people seems to have faith in their (present) friendship ; strong and unbreakable. I used to believe that we will be BFFs, but now, im no longer confident.

Lol I think I too sian got nothing to do then come boliao all my nonsense . This sucks ttm . I don't know why I like that also , I seriously think my brain sotsot one, to teachers so annoying, to my friends also so annoying . Seriously want to slap my own face already like times 100 -.- .

Aiyah ok anw -.-, went to watch ' The perfect getaway ' with Constance . The show quite nice, but v scary leys -.- , and very confusing . But also quite cool . LOL . See wtf am I talking, like seriouslyyyy . Ok anyway, Chloris coming back from Thailand today ^^v .

Physics is killing me ttm right now, like wtf is tension and shit like that . I hate dynamics ! I like kinematics 10x better I suck at that too . Ok i'm like wayyyy behind in homework, need to do it soon !!

All I want to know is that you care ^^v .

I don't care .

2010-02-15T20:15:00.000-08:00

It's a new year and I'm very happy ^^v . Went to visit both my ahma's on the first day . Then played daidi and I won $25 in 3 games ^_^ . Then went to my other ahma house and played blackjack + mahjong .

I like mai shoes :( . LOL .

If only my hair was really this colour )): .

K, was super tired when I reached home and I think I slept immediately :o .

Went to mummy's friend house on chu er . Sorry I like to camwhore . ^^v .

I think my lips here v cool, even though I look abit like tard :o .

Ok, went there played blackjack and I won $7 . ^^v . Then we went to ehub to watch Valentine day . Wanted to watch the 920 movie, but the seats, front 3 only , so watched the 1215 one instead . Was very loserishly trying to pass time, and ended up eating alot because of my sister and lying on the grass like bangalas .

I like the movie . ^^ . So many hot guys and pretty girls LOL . Reached home at around 430 and totally died . LOL .

Ok got some old picture in my camera from like, last last week ?

I've realised I'm really fucked up recently . I really shouldn't be like this . Sorry, if you think I hop friends . But apparently, if Chloris and Constance doesn't mind, who are you to do so ? I shouldn't be ignoring people who actually care , like them and Junqing because of those who don't . If because of this you don't want to be my friend, so be it . I really don't care anymore , at least I'm trying to .

Maybe I'll end up without friends or whatever, but for now , I'm happy like this . I shouldn't be ignoring them because of your words . Why should I let someone who doesn't care about me affect how I treat those who do ? I'm fucked up, I'm not nice . So thats why I should appreciate those who care more . :)

I fuck care you all . ^^v